A year ago, I bought this really nice professional filing cabinet with 5 drawers at the swap for an unbelievable $20.00. I have all my important papers filed in it. It didn’t have a key, but that wasn’t a problem because it didn’t have a key to lock it. Right?! Well, it finally locked itself this time I used it and I can’t open it anymore. I don’t know how or why it happened. I’ve finally come to the realization that I’ll just have to tear the lock up in order to open it. What a shame, because it doesn’t have a scratch and looks so nice.
I suppose I can accept disfiguring the filing cabinet that’s in mint condition, but what about the over 1,000 vintage safe I purchased a while ago? I paid a tow truck to tow it to my house. I paid a lock smith to figure out the combination. I paid these guys to bring it into the den. I put all my worldly possessions, such as my favorite gumball machine, my George Bush doll that doesn’t talk anymore (thank GAWD!), a couple of my rubber ducks, my Retirement Fund jar with quarters to the rim, my Smash-Me Bernie Madoff Doll, and something else which I can’t remember.
Hah! I lost the little piece of paper where I wrote the combination!
I think the time has come for this diabetic bitch to go on a shopping spree for oodles and oodles of all her favorite chocolate candy then rent a motel and O.D. on chocolate.