Playgirl's Mechanical World (playgirl) wrote,
Playgirl's Mechanical World

  • Mood:

Grandpa, Dead Rat Story


I pride myself for being cool, calm and collected, and having the stomach at confronting, touching and even eating unpleasant things that most people can’t. I can watch actual decapitations on videos, pick up with my bare hands little dead animals smashed beyond recognition from the streets, I can eat fried worms, grasshoppers, and the balls of a bull without fainting or throwing up.

Yup! I’m invincible, I’m Super Woman, EXCEPT when it comes to one little thing, which I’ll share with you right now.

The first part of the tale I’m about to share, will be a repeat, because I made a post about it in my journal, sometime ago. Then I’ll tell of the horrible thing that happened to me yesterday, when I got home from work.

Norma and I were outside, sitting on my front lawn chit chatting. Mickey and Jewely were playing, when I suddenly saw Jewely had some strange looking thing in her mouth. It was big, black and flat. I ran up to her and pulled the thing out of her mouth, put it to my face to see what it was. It was a dead rat! Not a mouse, but a rat! It looked and felt like beef jerky! When it dawned on me what it was, my knees started trembling, and I gave a blood curdling scream and threw out of my hands. Jewely started running for it again, but thank goodness Norma came to the rescue, because she ran picked it up, started running and screaming all over the place, until she came to her senses and ran to the trash can!

That evening, I brushed Jewely's teeth and washed her mouth with soap and water!!

Yes, when it comes to mice, I turn into a wet noodle, or a piece of delicate tissue paper!

I will never trust Grandpa again!

When I got to my front porch, my oodles of cats headed toward me to greet me. I had just gotten to the door to unlock it, when I looked down and saw something that looked strange right next to my feet. It looked like a smashed baby dead mouse. I couldn’t unlock the front door fast enough, as the hairs on my head started freaking out. Finally, I opened the door and started screaming for Grandpa. “GRANDPA! There’s a dead mouse on the porch!! HURRY up and get it before the cats eat it!! EEEKKK!!” Grandpa came running and ran outside and picked it up. I stood far away from the door, asking him if it was indeed a dead mouse. I saw him inspecting it closely, as he kept rubbing it with his fingers. Finally, he said that it wasn’t a dead mouse, but a fatty looking tree leaf. With great relief, I walked right next to him, and was just about to take the LEAF from his hand, when he suddenly said, “Oh yeah, it IS a dead mouse.” I then did the next best thing to collapsing on the floor, I ran away shrieking like crazy, and wet my pants!!

I think Grandpa needs glasses.

Playgirl's All Pumped Up

Join The NRA

"The Right Of The People To Keep and
Bear Arms, Shall Not Be infringed."
Tags: dead, dog, grandpa, personal, playgirl, story, terror
  • Post a new comment


    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded