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WHO TOOK PLAYGIRL'S...


WHO TOOK PLAYGIRL'S...
NOT WORK SAFE!



I’m a firm believer of having SAFE SEX, so where the hell is my Happy Little Farmer? Has anybody seen my dildo? I've looked under my bed. I’ve looked in my closet. I've looked in the frig. I've looked in my purse. I've looked everywhere! Grrr!

If I don’t find my Happy Little Farmer, I’ll have no choice but to buy another one. So, will somebody PLEASE tell me who took my little guy, 'cause I'm very lonely and I need him right NOW!




PLAYGIRL'S HAPPY FARMERS QUOTE:
"Target prices? How that works? I know quite a bit about
farm policy. I come from Indiana, which is a farm state.
Deficiency payments - which are the key - that is what
gets money into the farmer's hands. We got loan, uh,
rates, we got target, uh, prices, uh, I have worked
very closely with my senior colleague, (Indiana Sen.)
Richard Lugar, making sure that the farmers of Indiana
are taken care of."
- Vice President Dan Quayle
on being asked to define the term "target prices.
Quayle's press secretary then cut short the press
conference, after two minutes and 30 seconds.



PLAYGIRL PLEASE
CALM DOWN AND RELAX!

Comments

( 36 comments — Leave a comment )
ctuck
Jun. 8th, 2006 10:35 pm (UTC)
Happy little farmer? Is he the one who plows? Is he the one who works your feilds? Is he the one that wets your whistle... wait... that last pun sucked!
playgirl
Jun. 8th, 2006 10:40 pm (UTC)
Yup! That's him alright! heh heh
nebris
Jun. 8th, 2006 10:40 pm (UTC)
Relax
Do you put that on a loop or do you only need 3:36? *wink*

~M~
playgirl
Jun. 8th, 2006 10:41 pm (UTC)
Re: Relax
All I need is my strong little hands! heh heh
mehen
Jun. 8th, 2006 10:56 pm (UTC)
Little guy? hehe stop thief!!
playgirl
Jun. 8th, 2006 11:04 pm (UTC)
Yup! Rufus has been caught red handed pawed with my little guy!
buddave
Jun. 8th, 2006 11:06 pm (UTC)
I believe the first thing we better do here is determine the sex
of that dog that's carrying your load of wheat away.
If it is female, it probably just wants to check the crops.
However, if it be male, you may have some problems. (The dog
may be jealous and is getting rid of the ol' farm hand)
Good luck!!!:-)
playgirl
Jun. 8th, 2006 11:16 pm (UTC)
Rufus is the culprit alright! There’s no denying it! There’s guilt written all over his face.

Maybe if I start baking his doggy biscuits in the shape of a dildo, he’ll leave my Little Happy Farmer alone!
inspectorjury
Jun. 9th, 2006 12:51 am (UTC)
Tick tack paddy wack give the dog a boner.
playgirl
Jun. 9th, 2006 02:15 am (UTC)
Okay. But my dildo? NEVER!
(no subject) - dlanor - Jun. 9th, 2006 03:16 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - inspectorjury - Jun. 9th, 2006 04:00 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - playgirl - Jun. 9th, 2006 09:35 pm (UTC) - Expand
poetpaladin
Jun. 9th, 2006 03:04 am (UTC)
I've always wanted to be a gentleman farmer and grow something...
playgirl
Jun. 9th, 2006 04:37 pm (UTC)
I know you'll grow a beautiful crop someday...I just know it...
(no subject) - poetpaladin - Jun. 10th, 2006 08:14 pm (UTC) - Expand
ormembar
Jun. 9th, 2006 05:26 am (UTC)
hahaha tiene una cara de culpabilidad que no puede ocultarlo. Parece que despues de todo no fue muy seguro ;)
playgirl
Jun. 9th, 2006 04:40 pm (UTC)
Lo agarraron en las moras, verdad?! haaaaaaa
(no subject) - ormembar - Jun. 13th, 2006 04:26 pm (UTC) - Expand
moon_shine
Jun. 9th, 2006 06:14 am (UTC)
I could be your Happy Little Farmer any time you need!
*wink wink* ;)
playgirl
Jun. 9th, 2006 09:33 pm (UTC)
Only if you're a good farmer, are happy all the time, and enjoy working hard on the fields. ;o)
(no subject) - moon_shine - Jun. 10th, 2006 06:24 am (UTC) - Expand
lordremo
Jun. 9th, 2006 09:13 am (UTC)
On my WAY!
Well, I'm always willing to "stand in" as a replacement. And THAT DOG has a rather nasty notion of playing "FETCH the STICK"! KEEP the DOG AWAY from ME when I visit! Besides, your little farmer lacks the foreplay... While with me you will Reap what I sow!
playgirl
Jun. 9th, 2006 09:15 pm (UTC)
Re: On my WAY!
I'll be sure to keep Rufus in the doghouse.

When harvesting the cotton off my fields, don't use a cotton gin, but use thy hands, my Happy Little Farmer. heh heh
sputnik
Jun. 9th, 2006 01:20 pm (UTC)
that's either a very small dog or...
playgirl
Jun. 9th, 2006 04:36 pm (UTC)
It does look BIG, huh?! haaaaaaaaaa
polomex
Jun. 9th, 2006 04:23 pm (UTC)
We keep ours in the sock drawer. lol
playgirl
Jun. 9th, 2006 04:34 pm (UTC)
haaaaaaaaaa!
a_phoenix
Jun. 9th, 2006 07:59 pm (UTC)
I hope you find your Happy Little Farmer very soon!! No one can be happy and productive with out it!!

Maybe you should consider getting a Hitachi Magic Wand anyway??
playgirl
Jun. 9th, 2006 09:31 pm (UTC)
I haven't been productive at all, since I lost my Happy Little Farmer!

What's a Hitachi Majic wand???
Is it kind of like the wand the
Fairy Godmother used on
Cinderella's pumpkin?
(no subject) - a_phoenix - Jun. 9th, 2006 11:02 pm (UTC) - Expand
olafthunderfoot
Jun. 13th, 2006 06:32 pm (UTC)
wasn't me, i have my own!
playgirl
Jun. 14th, 2006 01:15 am (UTC)
You do? Can I borrow it?!
(no subject) - olafthunderfoot - Jun. 14th, 2006 01:29 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - playgirl - Jun. 14th, 2006 02:23 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - olafthunderfoot - Jun. 14th, 2006 02:29 am (UTC) - Expand
( 36 comments — Leave a comment )

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